Saturday, April 21, 2007
2:19 PM
I am totally NOT studying!!!

Damnit la. Haha. More than half of saturday's gone, and I think I've only done about an hour of serious work up till now.

I ought to be smacked!! =(

Been surfing the net, chatting on msn, blogging..in short, doing everything BUT study.

Howww!!!

Accounting's on mon!! Somemore at a freaking 9am in the morning..that leaves me with less than 2 days to study!!

Someone please slap some sense into me. Sit down next to me and supervise my mugging. I don't care what you do. I'm desperate enough. Hahaha.

Something totally random here!!

*myloves! =)

And I realised I forgot to add in one more thing I love!!

*my happy colours =)

I promise I promise, after publishing this I'm going to bury myself in accounting till I meet serena for dinner!!

Permission granted to smack me if I break my promise!! *crosses fingers

HAHAHA.

me
scribbled at
2:19 PM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

Friday, April 20, 2007
11:34 PM
I'm feeling much better already!!

Daddy called me after my paper to ask how was it..then I told him about the damn stupid mistake I made which is gonna cost me ALOT. Being the dearest daddy he always is, he told me not to think about it already since it's over..daddy just has this way of making me feel all better!! And his call couldn't have come at a better time..as though he knew I needed some comforting..haha. Thanks daddy dearest!! *muacks!!

Went for dinner with dear..and I got a pleasant surprise!!

I almost couldn't believe my eyes..the guy who hates buying flowers and can't tolerate being around flowers actually bought me a sunflower bouquet!! He didn't even buy me one for my 21st..and he actually gave me one today!! Although after that we got into a mini argument over where to eat and, I suspect, him being all touchy and annoyed cos' pple were staring at us and the flower. He hates attention apparently. And thinks it's damn paiseh to walk around with a flower even though I was the one holding it. Haha. But still, it's so pretty!! And it's really HUGE. The wrapping's in a pretty shade of purple!! And there are so many other little flowers and what looks like mini orchids surrounding it. Just looking at it makes me happy!! =)))

Emmy took a photo with it. She's jealous of my pretty sunflower!! So she says she doesn't want to talk to me anymore. Hahaha.

Thanks for buying me my favourite flower to cheer me up when you knew I was upset over my paper today. Super sweet of you!! *huggs =)

While we were walking, this group of guys walked past us. And one of them actually said, "Wahh!! MEI GUI HUA (rose)!!!" in a super loud voice.

Since when do roses and sunflowers look the same?? -__-'''

Anyways, I shall not think of my screwed up paper already. No use crying over spilt milk too..shall just try to mug and mug my weekend away and try to do better for the rest of my papers!!

1 down, 3 to go!!

me
scribbled at
11:34 PM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

6:13 PM
This is the first time I've cried after a paper.

Can't believe how careless and stupid I was.

I really can't.

It's over.

me
scribbled at
6:13 PM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

Thursday, April 19, 2007
2:43 PM
Lousy day. =(

Woke up really late cos' I slept pretty late last night..and for the past 3 hours or so, I haven't done anything concrete!! Arghh.

Just can't seem to concentrate..plus I have this super annoying headache. I hate it!!

It seems pointless trying to cram in facts now..although there's still like another 24 hours to my paper. I just can't focus, especially in my room, but I don't feel like going to the library or some random tutorial classroom to study by myself.

I just feel like sleeping my headache away. =(

Someone please motivate me..please find back my drive, or put me into panic mode, anything at all. Just as long as I study.

I need to study!!!

Sighh.

me
scribbled at
2:43 PM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

Wednesday, April 18, 2007
12:39 AM
Today was good!!

Spent my day studying with kc in one of the south spine's tutorial rooms. He taught me some accounting stuffs!!

Hope I don't forget them though. My memory always fails me even after he painstakingly explains concepts to me. Haii.

And I kept wanting to doze off haha. Terrible of me! Don't know why was I so tired when he was the one who hardly slept a wink the night before.

I love his analogies!! They're so funny I just laughed the whole time. Makes accounting easier to understand!!

*Direct method, step method, reciprocal method; new way of looking at them! =)

Thanks a bunch kc!! You're my saviour as always. Haha. And thanks for having enough faith in me to think that I'll do well, though I really don't know how you can come to that conclusion.

Stop saying it's because I'm a year 2 marketing student!! The year 1 accounting pple in my class are freaks. No way of beating them! Hahaha.

Didn't do super alot as usual, compared to the way I could sit and concentrate for hours during jc days, but still, I did some work!

Feel a wee bit better about the exams somehow. I think slowly understanding concepts is a good way to study! Cos' your brain links them together and you feel more reassured with each piece of knowledge that sits in your brain. Even if only for that moment. >_<

But unfortunately, I've only understood some accounting concepts; the most important part lies in applying them to my answers, which I still have no clue how!! *yikes.

Not to mention, I still feel like I haven't done anything for the rest of the modules. Is that scary or what.

Just compiled my stack of notes (not alot) for friday's paper; was doing a key points summary for each lecture and writing out the important flows and blah..taking a break now after lec 6 notes, cos' ben's notes are simply too boring!! They seriously put me to sleep, no offence. Haha. It's about as wordy as a research paper. Totally same pattern as the textbook. *insomniacs' cure

I have another tenthousandmillionsgazillions of things to study and learn and memorise and whatnot!!

Pray for me pple!! I'll pray for you too!! Haha. Jiayou jiayou!! =)

me
scribbled at
12:39 AM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

Tuesday, April 17, 2007
11:27 PM
I spent my entire day in NIE library!!

Stayed there from 11am to 8pm..supposedly studying haha. But of course, I didn't get alot done la. Just some. Still, it's better than not having done anything at all! Which would probably have been the case if I'd stayed in hall. But sadly, I kind of feel like nothing much went in lehh. Siann.

Serena's friend joined us halfway haha. Meihui is really quite funny!! And I discovered that she liked the yellow ranger last time too! Okay that's like totally random but we happened to be talking about childhood cartoons and all. Carebears, TMNT, captain planet and the blah. I think we spent more time entertaining ourselves than actually studying. Okay la, that's for me anyways. I was quite entertained by them. Hahaha.

I don't feel like doing anything anymore!! 9 hours in the library sounds totally convincing la. But I know I really didn't do much. Haha. I just keep consoling myself that I at least did something. And that my coursework hasn't been too bad. This is really wrong but I just keep doing it anyway!! Finding excuses for myself!! When exams start in 3 days. Shitttt!!

I am going out studying again tmr!! Kc's gonna teach me accounting!! My most hated, and also my most feared. I want openbook exam!! Bahh.

Someone keeps signing in to msn and the window keeps appearing at the bottom right hand corner of my screen. Irritating!! *randomness

I can't wait can't wait can't wait for 30th april!! When may comes, I want everything to be muchhh better!! Got myself a date with lings my dearest cuzzie once exams end!! We'll go shopping alrights!! I watch you shop, that is. Hahaha.

Ohh I just remembered something totally horriddd! Prof emailed us his final decision as to that piece of crap's grading for groupwork, and he gave him a B-!! We are NOT HAPPY!! But don't dare to object anymore..don't think the prof will want to entertain anymore of this from us too. And we're all busy with exams also la.

But he should have gotten a C at best!! And he got a B-!! How can!! *unfairness!

I hate the way he kept defending himself to the prof and spouting lie after lie!! You NEVER did tell us about your stupid email thingy okay! And the supposed lit review you did which was just some crap piece of work that doesn't even constitute a lit review! You never once sent that document to us alrights, so don't pretend that you did! All of us can swear by it!! We'd never seen it prior to your email to the prof la. Stop making so many dumbass excuses!!

Hmphh!!!

But no point getting pissed over this now also. The grading's been finalised, the case is closed..at least he didn't get to keep the A- which is rightfully OURS and OURS ONLY. So there!

Better don't let me see him around or I'll just smack him!! Pray hard please DON'T let him be in ANY of our classes next sem..*pray pray pray

Okays I don't wanna sound like some hateful, small-gas bitch going on and on about that idiot. Which is exactly what I've been doing.

Waste of time!!

Before I end..just to quote em's msn nick..

A head bowed, a minute of silence for the virginia tech tragedy...

I don't really know what happened and why it happened, but my heart goes out to all who're affected by the senseless massacre..victims and family alike..you'll all be in my prayers.

Please stay strong.

me
scribbled at
11:27 PM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

Monday, April 16, 2007
11:58 PM
I hate exams. =(

I think schools should just do away with exams. Especially for a course like mine where I spend my entire semester doing nothing but projects and assignments, reports and blah. They should just account for 100% of my grade!!

I already spend all my time doing all those and in the process, forget that I actually do still have to study for the finals. Like wth la.

Okay, so maybe I'm making excuses. But I still stand by my statement that exams should be abolished!!

Cos' I hate exams!! Bahh.

Anyways, I think I've grown the last few weeks. Okay yes, I know we're always growing every minute, every second, but that's not the growth I'm referring to. Haha.

Was just doing some reflection on myself over the past month or so..realised that I've really turned off the water taps quite abit. I still remember the buckets and buckets of tears I let flow when I first found out about daddy's condition..forgoing everything, lessons and all, skipping all classes imaginable and simply not giving a damn to schoolwork at all.

I've also pretty much thought things through with regards to relationships..won't elaborate any further la. But yeah, I'm no longer the crybaby I used to be when it comes to you. Maybe cos' you don't give me many reasons to cry these days. =)

Maybe the things which have been happening to me built up quite alot on myself cos'..I dunno. Never really expected such a scenario? It's really true..takes a rude wake up call to remind you of what's important in life.

I've learnt to see the good in the bad, accept reality as it is, but not bow down to fate. I still believe that fate lies in your own hands, as far as you can change it to suit your desired destiny. Maybe this is what people have been meaning when they tell me to be stronger..not to sucuumb so easily to my emotions, learn to be strong mentally and stand up to obstacles dealt in my face.

Cos' after all, I'm not the only one going through this. I have to spare a thought for others too..just because I suffer, doesn't mean they don't. Everyone has their own set of problems, whether big or small. I'm no different. In fact, given my circumstances, no matter how bad things seem, I know there are always people out there who have it worse, and who have to learn to be much stronger in order to deal with it.

Of course, there are also plenty others who have it good, have it better. I used to compare myself to them and wonder, why can't I lead a life like that?

But no matter how unfair the world may seem..I believe there is a balance somehow, somewhere. There will still be that bit of fairness in everyone's life; even the smallest bit counts. So, I should be thankful instead for my blessings! =)

This current obstacle is a blessing in itself. It's really a learning point, a turning point. I hope we can all learn together.

Hope I can make the best out of it, gain the most out of it, learn to be a stronger me. Learn not to cower in the face of an obstacle, not to always resort to tears as the first step. Learn to handle my emotions in a different way, to look at the situation more positively.

If I can, so can anyone! And of course, the reverse is also true. If others can do it, why not me? =)

Jiayou!!

me
scribbled at
11:58 PM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

10:05 PM
Haven't blogged in the few days I've been at home! Feel like I need to blog before I can start studying. What crap. Hahaha.

Haven't done much the entire weekend..thought I'd be studying my weekend away, but NO!! I've been slacking my days and nights away and simply not giving a hoot to exams at all!!

In short, I'm dead la.

Don't know how many days am I behind in my revision schedule already..and I'm cutting corners by skipping the textbook readings for some lectures. Hai. So much for studying. I'm like running towards the edge of the rooftop knowing I'm going to fall off..and I'm doing that willingly.

Arghhh.

Anyways, Daddy's going vegetarian!! Like no choice lehh. The alternative diet to ensuring a healthy lifestyle now, and especially in future, to try and prevent any relapses..one interesting thing I learnt today is that birds' nest is bad for cancer!! The 3 of us just looked at one another in disbelief when the aunty told us that. Hahaha. So now we have birds' nest sitting at home, but the intended recepient can't eat them. Wasted!! And I thought they were health products. Something about eating birds' nest is akin to feeding the cancer cells. So scary!!

So now, I'll start to become a partial vegetarian too. At least, when I'm home la. Easier to cook and less tempting for daddy too..imagine eating yummy chicken wings in front of him. He'll smack me. Hahaha. I like veg, but I can't imagine going vegetarian. I like meat too much. I still prefer to be an omnivore. Lol.

It's so stressing to see so much money flowing out in terms of expenses, yet no money coming in..I want to help to save what I can, but when it comes to me and cheryl, mummy and daddy still think we ought to have the best..of course, now everything that's the best must go to daddy first. No complaints there, definitely, but I wish they'll think more for themselves and less for us. Parents will always be parents..hopefully we can cope the next few months..think it's going to be the toughest yet but..no pain no gain!! Esp. for daddy..compared to him, I think nothing we go through can even be termed suffering. I just want the whole treatment process to go by smoothly with minimal side effects and complete recovery at the end..even if I have to be a vegetarian, I'll do so without complaints..

Okay it's time to hit the books again. Sucks. Can't wait for this to be over. Complete nightmare!!

Jiayou everyone!!

me
scribbled at
10:05 PM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

.girl in question.
[geri]
[turned twenty ONE on 28th jan!]
[aquarian]
[shopaholic]
[ij to tj to nbs]
[crazy moments]
[can be a biatch]
[2903]

.adores.
[rainbow] [stars]
[trumpet] [sunshine]
[monokuro boo] [tigger]
[shopping] [candy empire]
[family and friends*hugs*]

.take note.
nothing for now.all in my head.

.wants.
|i just want YOU to be alright. recover soon please..|

.current loves.
||my family||

.darlings.
amala amanda amy anneson benji berenice candice cherish cheryl chih lin christina cindy corinne daniel darren dawn deborah dern eileen elayne gerald guanyu huiteng huixun jasmine jeannie jiabao jieying jinyuan joan kingman layleng lianya luther marinah melf mitchelle neo nina ntusb pamela peiqin pyrite's blog sheryl tow boon vanessa wenhui yifen youwei ziyun

.click on them.
baumhouse birks- gso birks- jestel kg friendster haloscan hollister hyper-act! michael phelps club naturlich footshop orisinal who lives near you

.memories.
|tjband|
[syf 2003]
[prelude XXIII]
[prelude XXIV]
[trumpet section 2003]
[band thailand trip]
[trumpet section outing]
[wasbe 2003]
|2903|
[prom 2004!]
[class outing to beach]
[2903 album]
[sentosa]
|iras|
[concen TCOs]
|ij clique|
[bbq at bern's house]