Friday, March 30, 2007
1:15 AM
"If you can't get someone out of your head then maybe they are supposed to be there. You can always start liking someone over and over again but you can never stop loving someone. Even though you're so close to me, you are still so distant and I can't bring you back."

This quote is so true..really struck a chord somehow.

Sometimes I wonder if I made the right choice..if once upon a time, I was too hasty in not being accepting..but I guess it's too late to wonder all that now.

I feel as though I really can't bring you back..no matter how hard I try. I find myself not even trying much anymore these days. You seem more tolerant somehow, but I don't know if it'll last. I keep telling myself, learn to let go, cos' in life, there will always be times when we have to let something or someone go. It's probably one of the hardest things to do, but if necessary, it will still have to be done..

I just don't know if I'll have to do that anytime soon.

I can't convince myself, no matter how hard I try. When a brand new day starts, I'm back to square one. I wallow in the sadness, waste gallons of tears, and all for what? I used to be so much more emo that when I think back now, I don't know how I survived those days and torturous nights. I'm less teary now not because I've run out of tears, but because I have so much more on my mind these days. Other things will eventually take priority. You're right about that.

Actually, I don't even know what's going on now. You made me so happy once upon a time, but it all lasted for such a short while. In the blink of an eye, it's all gone. I kind of regret not cherishing those moments more. But I didn't expect them to be so short-lived.

I can't see what the future holds for me, for us. When I once could. Now, that's an effortful thought. I can't see my finishing line, can no longer envision the process towards that line. Maybe I've lied to myself for too long. And kept on trying even though deep down, I know that there may be no happy ending.

I've said till I'm so tired, that it takes 2 hands to clap. Maybe we're clapping from a different angle, such that there's no effect at all. It's like wasted effort, trying in vain. At least, that's for me. That's how I feel.

I miss your silliness. Your past attitude to love. Everything about you in the past. I no longer see that now. I pray and hope that I will, but I feel like I'm holding on to empty promises.

My mind is a blank. And I only know one thing.

"Even though you're so close to me, you are still so distant and I can't bring you back."

me
scribbled at
1:15 AM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

.girl in question.
[geri]
[turned twenty ONE on 28th jan!]
[aquarian]
[shopaholic]
[ij to tj to nbs]
[crazy moments]
[can be a biatch]
[2903]

.adores.
[rainbow] [stars]
[trumpet] [sunshine]
[monokuro boo] [tigger]
[shopping] [candy empire]
[family and friends*hugs*]

.take note.
nothing for now.all in my head.

.wants.
|i just want YOU to be alright. recover soon please..|

.current loves.
||my family||

.darlings.
amala amanda amy anneson benji berenice candice cherish cheryl chih lin christina cindy corinne daniel darren dawn deborah dern eileen elayne gerald guanyu huiteng huixun jasmine jeannie jiabao jieying jinyuan joan kingman layleng lianya luther marinah melf mitchelle neo nina ntusb pamela peiqin pyrite's blog sheryl tow boon vanessa wenhui yifen youwei ziyun

.click on them.
baumhouse birks- gso birks- jestel kg friendster haloscan hollister hyper-act! michael phelps club naturlich footshop orisinal who lives near you

.memories.
|tjband|
[syf 2003]
[prelude XXIII]
[prelude XXIV]
[trumpet section 2003]
[band thailand trip]
[trumpet section outing]
[wasbe 2003]
|2903|
[prom 2004!]
[class outing to beach]
[2903 album]
[sentosa]
|iras|
[concen TCOs]
|ij clique|
[bbq at bern's house]