Saturday, November 26, 2005
10:40 PM
Going malaysia tmr morning for the next 3days, but I dun wanna go! Not only because I dun feel like going there, but also cos' I'm leaving lots of loose ends hanging by going on a holiday liddat. Same goes for the hk trip next week...at first I thought it would be okay. But suddenly everything's piling up from all directions! >_<

Got abc subcomm stuff to settle, and I'm trying to rush it by tonight since I'll be away tmr. But everyone is either not picking up their phone, or simply switch it off! Worse still when it's connected to an overseas call. And the handwriting of the girls who sign up for the sports event are atrocious. I think I called a few wrong numbers all thanks to their less-than-perfect handwriting. My goodness. What a headache. Sighh.

Anw, had comm meeting today..last night was pretty stressed up talking to soonwei about what I should present at the meeting today. Was rather afraid of being arrowed by nic, considering that as bizmags, we seem pretty useless and quite a failure in looking for sponsorships. The situation really doesn't look too good. I wonder where are we gonna get enough money to finance our events and keep the band going for the year. Sighh. But anw, the meeting was alright. Nic was nice today. Nvr shoot me down in anything either, considering our dismal performance so far. I half feel like cancelling all my holiday plans so that I can concentrate on comm stuff properly..but it's too late to do anything now. Ah well. And I feel damn bad that I'll be gone during the crucial period for bizmags. This means that I gotta throw everything to soonwei. I'm so sorry sw..make you tie up the loose ends for me... >_<

Heard from adeline tdy that mavis didn't wanna play for concert. And maybe even wanna quit band. Of cos' I had to confirm with mav herself. Thankfully she has decided to play after all..actually I can understand why she wants to quit. In fact, her reply was as I anticipated. In short, the problem is, back in tj, the band was like family. Here, it doesn't even seem like a band. She's totally right. And I agree with her, sadly though. If not for comm, I think I would have quit already. In fact, I can't deny that I'm toying with the idea of quitting after stepping down next year. That is, if things still don't improve. Whether in terms of the band's standards or the bond between the members. Without a close-knit family kind of bond, it's hard to sound good. The reason why tjband always had this magical sound and quality was, I believe, largely due to the fact that we were one family. Really bonded and close-knit. I miss that kind of feeling.

Maybe it's a bad thing that uni has so much freedom. Too little discipline. People come for prac when they feel like it, or when they are free. They pon without a word when sth else crops up. And often, everything else that crops up is more impt than band prac. Hence the shocking attendance at times. I really hate it. I dun understand why. If they're gonna treat it so lightly, like a place for them to play an instrument when they feel like it, then why join band in the first place? And the thing is, almost all of them come from other bands, be it in pri sch or sec sch. They should have gone through those days of disciplined practices where absence was only allowed with a leave form and permission from the teacher. Where everyone played with heart and soul, played out of a love for music, played together as a band. Here, I cannot even begin to describe how we sound like.

It's bad enough that our standard is slowly dropping. The worst is, no one seems to be doing anything about it. It's all too easy to talk about it, to lament abt ntu band's drop in standard, how we dun sound good anymore. But action always speaks louder than words. And I dun see that action happening.

I want to play in a band which is united as one, so that everyone playing together will sound like one too. Instead of a mixture of different sounds. Like, if I have 9 trumpeters playing, I hear 9 different tones when what I really want to hear is just one beautiful sound. Individually, I believe we have good players. Some are really quite good, others maybe a little lacking in techniques etc (like me). But the thing is, we just can't seem to combine into the sound of one band.

In tj, although we were not always note-perfect, our dynamics not always according to the piece, and not technique-perfect all the time, somehow, we managed to achieve a kind of sound that spoke of unity. The effect was so magical, it once brought tears to the eyes of the audience. That is the kind of sound I hope ntu band can one day have. And I hope it will be one day soon. Playing in a band just for the sake of playing will become a chore sooner or later. I joined band because I enjoy playing in a band. I love the camaraderie that I felt back in tjband, and I thought I would be able to feel that once more in ntu band. But I am disappointed.

My christmas wish...is for ntu band to become family. The magic word is ohana. For without it, the band will not be bonded, and no matter how good each individual player is, we will never sound good as a band.

"Ohana means family. And family means nobody gets left behind." -tjc orientation 2003

me
scribbled at
10:40 PM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

Wednesday, November 23, 2005
1:40 PM
Been wanting to blog for a few days now, but I've been going out almost everyday. So no time. Haha.

Went out with my dear ij friends last fri to go kboxing..my 2nd time in 2days! But I'm glad to say that I had loads of fun at kbox with them. =) Klunch sucks though. Haha. And the room was so darn cold! Brrr. Anyway, we went shopping in town after that. Spent the entire afternoon in far east plaza! And spent 3/4 of that time agonising over whether or not to buy a top. Which I didn't buy in the end. Lol.

Shopping with them was really fun...though halfway through eileen looked as if she was going to collapse if we didn't sit down soon. Haha. Too bad mayhui, eileen and huizhen were still having exams so they couldn't go..jiabao too. Nvm, plenty more chances to go out together! =) Continued some shopping at tpy with bern after that..fun fun fun! Though we ended up walking up and down. Haha. I can practically walk ard tpy with my eyes closed. Heh.

It was great meeting up with them again. No matter how seldom I go out with them, my ij clique is still the best. The friendships forged then still last till now. Even when everyone else has their own frens from jc, from uni, everytime we meet up and get together again, I just love that feeling, love being around them. In short, I love them! *huggs =)

That aside..I went out with siti on mon to watch harry potter! I love the show..even if it was nowhere ass detailed as the book. And the fact that they changed some little details. And cedric diggory is so cute! Why did he have to die man. Sighh. It was so sad la. I actually cried. Anyway, we went shopping after the movie! I just love going out with siti. She's really a great fren who's always by my side whenever I need a listening ear. And siti knows all my secrets too! Haha. Stuff which I dun tell others, dunno how to tell others, she knows them all. It's so funny sometimes, when I think of what I tell her and vice versa. Haha. But well, we'll be friends forever! That's sth we both know. Love ya dearie! =)

Ohh! I went out again yesterday. With kc. Haha. We went ps to watch zorro..hey the show is really quite nice! Boss was right when he said it's a good show. Very long too! About 2hrs 15mins. Worth the money. Haha. The two of us were like trying to waste time before the movie started at 3pm, so we wemt to eat lunch at mos. He refused to let me pay for the movie ticket la! So nvm, I paid for lunch! Seeing his exasperation was damn funny. Walked around alittle and talked alot more after that..and we ate gelare waffles! Yesterday being tuesday mah. Half price! Haha. And again, kc paid for it. He just refuses to let me pay him back! Urgh. But still...thanks kc. =) He's really another wonderful friend I can talk to about anything. Our phone conversations are always so long. Haha. After the movie, we went to the arcade! Again, kc paid. Oh man..next time I gotta throw his wallet away. Haha. Actually, I wasn't sure if he should be going out at all yesterday. Cos' the day before, amazing kc got hit by this huge guy (he calls an elephant) while playing street soccer. After the wham came the darkness. Haha. He landed himself in hospital for concussion la. Wah lau. Playing street soccer! I dunno what to say liao. But at least he rested enough in hospital and at home. I hope. Still, it's good that he looked fine yesterday. =)

Today's a boring day though. Not happening enough. Haha. Woke up damn freaking late! Wonder how I managed to sleep through all the drilling and knocking that's going on next to and above my house. Damn irritating! Even as I'm typing, they're drilling away like their life depended on it. It's driving me crazy! And I'm gonna hafta put up with this darn noise pollution till next year. After which, they're gonna get started on the other lift. Somebody save me. I wanna move house. >_<

I guess...since the last time I blogged, I've been happier. Going out with my ij darlings, with siti, with kc..the friends I really treasure and love. Friends I know I can count on. And friends I'm confortable with, friends who never make me feel like I dun belong. Thank god for them. =) And partner..thanks for asking about me when we talked yesterday. It was fun to just crap and talk for that hour plus..you make a great phone buddy! Haha. Next time I'm bored, I know who to call. Lol. But really...thanks for your concern la. Didn't know you still read my blog. Hope we can go watch movie soon when jy is free! =)

Okay..my computer is cranking up again...shall just blog till here. I feel like I've been blogging nonsense. But nvm, as long as I know what I'm talking about, it's enough. =)

me
scribbled at
1:40 PM

*[dream as if you'll live forever. live as if you'll die today]*

.girl in question.
[geri]
[turned twenty ONE on 28th jan!]
[aquarian]
[shopaholic]
[ij to tj to nbs]
[crazy moments]
[can be a biatch]
[2903]

.adores.
[rainbow] [stars]
[trumpet] [sunshine]
[monokuro boo] [tigger]
[shopping] [candy empire]
[family and friends*hugs*]

.take note.
nothing for now.all in my head.

.wants.
|i just want YOU to be alright. recover soon please..|

.current loves.
||my family||

.darlings.
amala amanda amy anneson benji berenice candice cherish cheryl chih lin christina cindy corinne daniel darren dawn deborah dern eileen elayne gerald guanyu huiteng huixun jasmine jeannie jiabao jieying jinyuan joan kingman layleng lianya luther marinah melf mitchelle neo nina ntusb pamela peiqin pyrite's blog sheryl tow boon vanessa wenhui yifen youwei ziyun

.click on them.
baumhouse birks- gso birks- jestel kg friendster haloscan hollister hyper-act! michael phelps club naturlich footshop orisinal who lives near you

.memories.
|tjband|
[syf 2003]
[prelude XXIII]
[prelude XXIV]
[trumpet section 2003]
[band thailand trip]
[trumpet section outing]
[wasbe 2003]
|2903|
[prom 2004!]
[class outing to beach]
[2903 album]
[sentosa]
|iras|
[concen TCOs]
|ij clique|
[bbq at bern's house]